[Editorial] Editor’s Note - Mental Health and Horror

This week has been Mental Health Awareness Week which means there has been a lot of discussion on mental health and how horror films have helped people through the toughest of times. For a long time I always thought that horror films were maybe not a helpful way of coping with my problems, especially seeing as the ones I prefer are often particularly heavy going in terms of their oppressive tone and also depicting some of the most soul-destroying aspects of humanity. However, over the years I began to realise that when I avoid watching horror films my mental state doesn’t cope too well and find myself lingering on moments of distress more so than I would when I’m watching horror films and finding a form of catharsis from them. 

Opening up about my own mental health hasn’t always been something that has been easy for me; personally I’ve always found it much easier to be completely closed off emotionally and struggle through any feelings I’m having by just shutting myself off from the world. For as long as I can remember this has been my coping mechanism, and it always seemed like the right way to handle things and really protect myself from others, but in 2020 I realised that wasn’t the case at all. Last year in October I decided to take my own life… In some ways I didn’t realise how bad my mental health had gotten, all I knew was that it felt like I was drowning and there was no way to resurface, and therefore the only option was to tie an anchor to myself and let the waves take me out to sea. It’s not until you find yourself in the back of an ambulance and then sat in a hospital waiting to find out if you’d permanently damaged yourself that you realise that things are bad. There was a lot of healing that needed to be done afterwards, and so much of that healing process is still an ongoing journey for me but the main thing I realised was that communicating and being open about how I’m feeling is the only way to prevent myself from drowning. 

The first question people asked me was: ‘Why?’ But answering that wasn’t straightforward because it’s hard to explain why when there really isn’t an exact moment that says ‘This is why I tried to kill myself.’ But after that question had dissipated from most people, I found there was so much support, especially when I was open about it in the horror community - so many of you reached out personally and have ever since been a huge support and always pop in to check on me. That sense of community and friendship online and having people I know I can turn to if I need to has been a lifeline, something that really cements my belief that horror fans are the best people in the world. But of course, it wasn’t just the horror community that kept me going, it was horror films that often provided an outlet for me to safely experience the feelings that I was feeling and go through an on-screen process of confronting and accepting that having a feeling of horror and terror inside yourself is absolutely okay. For so many years I was afraid to admit that I had negative feelings, instead bottling them up and keeping them inside, believing I always had to be this super happy, super energetic, super funny and outgoing woman that didn’t ever need to be looked after or ask for help, but my god, how fucking wrong that belief was. But through horror it gave me a way to go through those negative emotions without having to fully put them out into the world when I wasn’t completely ready. 

All of those aspects of my past traumas and troubles that were causing the problems with my mental health and took me to that dark place were found in the depths of horror films, and therefore I realised they are the comfort I need to keep my mind in a good place. Perhaps watching someone being tortured on-screen isn’t everyone’s idea of healing and catharsis but for me, it was and still is, representative of the pain that I’m often feeling on the inside and how extreme those emotions feel inside of me, something that I cannot fully communicate with words, but through scenes and visual depictions, it allows me to have an outlet that describes exactly how I’m feeling. 

Watching extreme films which show disturbing and controversial elements that often take it out of you mentally certainly isn’t for everyone, and I know so many people that have said watching films like August Underground or Guinea Pig: Flowers of Flesh and Blood actually puts their mind and state in an awful place and that’s absolutely okay. The way we process our own personal traumas and damages is always going to be vastly different to one another's, and that’s what makes us all so uniquely different. Personally I like to indulge in watching really horrible and nasty scenes of torture on-screen because it externalises the suffering I’m sometimes feeling on the inside and that’s just how I deal with my mental health. Through extreme horror films I have found an outlet that has helped me to deal with the things that caused me to try and take my own life, and even now my therapist refers to many of my problems in a horror film setting because she understands that horror is a language I can communicate in and make work for my metaphors. 

I also want to take a moment to thank everyone who has been so open and honest about their mental health this week and how horror has been a support. We’ve been doing a ‘Mental Health & Horror’ campaign through a video series this week and the response has been so incredibly touching and powerful. Firstly I was lucky enough to be able to host a panel discussion on ‘Comfort in Fear’ with a fucking amazing line-up of guests. If you’d like to catch-up on the panel discussion, you can do so here.

• Mae Murray

  • Mae reached out to Ghouls Magazine on Twitter and works in mental health as a day job so has so much knowledge on the subject. Mae is also a big horror fan and has found that using horror has helped mental health. You can follow Mae on Twitter!

• Lakkaya Palmer

  • Another person that reached out to me on Twitter but instantly came across as incredibly warm and insightful regarding horror and mental health. Lakkaya is currently looking at masculinity and Fatherhood in American horror films which is such a fascinating topic. You can follow Lakkaya on Twitter!

• Jenn Adams

  • One of our wonderful Ghouls contributors, and also someone that knows SO much about mental health and horror. Jenn co-runs Psychoanalysis: A Horror Therapy Podcast and has heard from so many horror fans how the genre has helped them with mental health. You can follow Jenn on Twitter!

• Tim Coleman

  • Tim was someone I connected with through Twitter and in particular the Evolution of Horror community. I’ve always admired Tim’s work and had seen him talking about horror and mental health online before. Incredibly insightful and always delivering his thoughts so eloquently. You can follow Tim on Twitter!

• Mal Jutley

  • Mal was another person I met through the horror community, but this time through FrightFest and connecting London-based circles. Mal is a huge mental health advocate and someone that I appreciate a lot for being so open and honest about his own mental health experiences. You can follow Mal on Twitter!

• Oh Golly! Miss Dolly! 

  • Dolly is someone quite new to the horror community, but one of the most positive and lovely people I’ve had the pleasure of meeting. After hopping on her What A Scream Podcast I was really interested to hear more about Dolly’s experiences with postnatal depression and horror, something she spoke about on the panel. You can follow Dolly on Instagram!

But the sharing hasn’t stopped there. We have been sharing video entries from some of our Ghouls contributors but also amazing people from the horror community. Listening to these wonderful people open up about their own mental health and how they’ve used horror to cope has been so inspiring for me; it was really tough for me to open up about my own mental health on camera but after having watched so many strong people do the same, I felt like it was okay. The horror community constantly gets slammed and shamed, but when you take a moment to really connect with others, it’s easy to see that this community is one of the most powerful. 

• In the first video I talk about why horror helped me after I tried to commit suicide… It’s a bit awkward but completely open and unedited. Watch here.

• Ariel Powers-Schaub spoke about how the Scream and Saw franchises both helped her with mental health. Watch here. And don’t forget to follow Ariel on Letterboxd. 

• Ariel Baska spoke very openly about her mental health and how horror has helped her to heal from many aspects of her life. Watch here. Don’t forget to check out Ariel’s podcast Ride The Omnibus.

• Jerry Sampson opened up about how watching extreme horror films has helped her to deal with ancestral trauma throughout her life. Watch here. Make sure you check out Jerry’s other work.

• Assistant Editor for Ghouls Magazine, Rebecca McCallum, talks about how Lars Von Trier’s Antichrist has been a huge help with processing her anxiety and mental health. Watch here. You can also find Rebecca’s other work over on Twitter.

• Lindsay from Behind The Screams Podcast spoke about how through horror she is able to visualise and externalise emotions in a safe setting. Watch here. You can find Lindsay on Twitter.

• Jess from Spinsters of Horror openly spoke about how setting up Spinsters with Kelly has been a lifeline, and how she processes trauma when it is represented through horror films. Watch here.  You can find Jess & more of her work on Twitter.

• Mattie Lewis spoke about how Robert Egger’s The Witch was one of the most important films, and helped to express personal traumas. Watch here. You can follow Mattie on Twitter.

What I wanted to do this week was just shine a light on how horror has really become a place for us to find comfort and process our own trauma. It doesn’t matter what films you do and don’t find cathartic, but having horror as a way to heal and cope is such an incredible aspect. For everyone that has shared their stories this week, thank you so much for your contributions and being so open - we need to talk about mental health more because it really does help others. 

No matter how you deal with your mental health, it’s clear that for many of us horror fans, horror films are a way for us to personally cope with whatever we are going through. And if you ever feel like giving up, please know that it is not worth it and there are so many of us just a message away to try and help in whatever way possible. If you ever feel like you need someone to talk to, personally my inbox is always open to lend a shoulder, and to also discuss horrors that could help us through those emotions. 

Sending love

xxxx

Z

RELATED ARTICLES

---

---

EXPLORE

---

MORE ARTICLES

---

---